Yoga was not always a part of my life. I watched yoga on the sidelines guilting myself for not doing what looked like a healthy trend that everyone is doing. I didn’t see myself doing it because I felt it was for those with the “right” body, flexibility, and strength. When I finally braved trying yoga in a class I was surprised by how much I enjoyed it, and how important it was to be mindful of my own needs. This was the start of a great journey.

 

I was in my late twenties when we discovered that I am losing my eyesight. I have a genetic juvenile macular degeneration called Stargardts. The progression of the disease has been quite gradual over the past 10 years allowing me to adapt (sometimes in frustration) along the way.  I may not be able to control what eye sight I have, I can however choose the vision I have in life. 

 

I will not sit here and say that watching my blindspots grow and take over the remainder of my central vision isn't hard. I will say though that I am able to find some positive things in it all. For one, it teaches me to not rely on how things look. For me, learning not to focus on appearances was a big lesson to learn, and it is one that became a major player in my own yoga journey.

 

There were a few years where I considered doing yoga teacher training, and for various reasons kept putting it off (after all, having 2 sets of twins, and running your own business is more than a full plate).  When I finally became more serious about moving forward my biggest concern was, “How can I instruct people to do yoga if I cannot see them?” At that time I was under the impression that it is the yoga teachers responsibility to make sure students are doing the poses right. Little did I know then how little being able to see the students really matters if you guide them right. 

 

I remember the exact moment when I decided I could teach yoga without seeing. I was sitting in a local yoga class with a new (to me) teacher, Emily Gilmore. She had the most graceful way of describing how to maneuver our bodies into different poses to the point where I didnt even want to look at what she was doing. I literally closed my eyes and let her voice beautifully guide me from pose to pose. I didn't need to look up to see if I was matching her or the other students. My mind was shut down and I was in a beautiful place within myself. I knew that this was an important style of teaching, one that I wanted to do for others who are blind/vision impaired, and also for those who are fully sighted. 

 

I was in the perfect place to set out on my path when I started my yoga teacher training with Cindy Beers of Red Head Yoga. My studies in yoga teacher training focused on making yoga accessible to all. All experiences, all ages, all body types, all personalities, all people. Learning how to verbally cue poses, learning what challenges different people experience, learning modifications, learning prop use, and so many more things so that I may be there for students that would cross my path. 

 

When I completed my yoga teacher training I was excited and on my way. I got a nice weekly gentle yoga class going at Dillsburg Yoga…and then Covid intervened. Even though I do not drive, I never considered doing virtual classes. I honestly felt that going to a nice yoga studio was an important part in creating the right conditions for a great yoga experience. So as I reluctantly ventured into the virtual world I noticed some great things. I got to see people join virtually who were too nervous or intimidated to come to a studio. I got to see people who pass on classes because of the commuting time. And even for myself, I realized how nice it was to create my own peaceful place in my own home, to be able to garden and then in 10 min be in front of a screen of faces, and to have more flexibility in class times. 

 

It was at this time I was also going through mobility training for my vision impairment, specifically on how to navigate with my blind cane. My mobility coach was talking about how many of the people she has been working with who are feeling really isolated and down. Knowing that I was doing online yoga classes she asked if she could direct people to me for a virtual gathering. It didn't take long for us to gather a screen full of people for our weekly “Chair Yoga for the Blind and Vision Impaired.” We would chat for a good hour about whatever we needed to talk about and then settle in for chair yoga. It helped me practice verbal cuing even more, and really feel into exactly what I’m doing and how to express it in a simple way to people (some of which have absolutely no sight). It was great that the group was there for me as well, to answer my question about how my guidance works for them, and understanding their different challenges they face. 

 

I have loved how much I fall in love with my own yoga practice by teaching others. I have learned things from other teachers, and even more from other students. It has encouraged me to teach yoga in a way that makes it YOU-nique for each person. I invite students to follow my lead or to do what they need to do during the class. If a person really likes a pose and we move on I encourage them to stay in that pose until it feels complete for them. If a person doesn’t like a particular pose I give them that freedom to improvise with a different pose (though nudge them to reflect on why they do not like that pose). Each person's needs will vary, and even a person's needs can vary from day to day. I feel yoga practices can meet a person where they are. Not all yoga sessions need to be “productive” in the sense of mastering a pose. Sometimes our bodies need that sigh of relief that they can just be in that moment without breaking new barriers. 

 

My own experiences in life have all made an impact on how I practice and teach yoga. I have been through significant weight ranges. I know the obstacles with rolls, loose skin, and all the body images that come with that. I found that getting out of my head was the first step in appreciating my body. So when I could set in a pose and notice the body that was making that possible it did wonders for my practice and my mental health. I also deal with challenges with hypermobility. This can seem like a great feature, being able to bend in creative ways, though in reality it translates to having a lack of stability. So doing yoga became a way of working on balance, paying attention to ranges of movement, strengthening areas for better support, and other mindfulness in ways of keeping my body safe. Related to hypermobility, I have had injuries and surgeries, all of which helped me learn more adaptations to still be able to practice yoga. My mindset also fluctuates. There are some time periods where daily morning yoga is a priority of mine. There are times when I need yoga to relax and unwind. Then other times I feel the calling for an invigorating yoga session. 

 

I greatly enjoy doing private yoga sessions. It's in these moments that I get the opportunity to introduce a person to yoga and to be able to let them envision what yoga could be for them. Some come looking for mindfulness, some to gain flexibility, some to strengthen, and some have no clue other than they want to try. I enjoy getting to know them, their visions, and then laying things out for them to have a positive experience. 

 

I tend to be a master of blending things. I do love yoga, though I love comboing it up with other things I also love. I have done Tai Chi Yoga where I blend in tai chi movements with yoga poses. Other times I have brought Sound Healing into the mix with a gentle or restorative yoga session. I also have enjoyed other special events such as yoga and painting, allowing a yoga flow to stimulate creativity for painting on a canvas. I slip yoga into different events in different ways. It is such a heartwarming feeling to see someone get excited over yoga when they never thought they could or would do it, let alone enjoy it. 

 

I will not say that I am all yoga all the time. Truth is, there are sometimes weeks between when I have an actual “yoga practice.” However, I pull it into everyday in some way. When I stretch before getting out of bed to warm up my joints. When I arch my back after leaning over my art table. When I feel anxiety creeping in and receive some deep breaths. When I train in karate and bring in body awareness while executing techniques. When I’m feeling in a rut and allow my mind to visualize things lifting me into a better mental state. So it's not that I feel yoga is a way of life for me, I feel it is a part of life for me. 

 

Interested in doing yoga with me? Join me at this years PA Yoga Lovefest at Amethyst Retreat Center in Duncannon PA, September 22-24th 2023, where I will be leading a “Yoga for Feeling, Not Seeing” and where you will get to slip on an eye mask and experience a gentle yoga flow by really tuning in and feeling into it. I offer a free Chair Yoga for the Blind and Vision Impaired the first Thursdays of the month through Zoom. I see clients at Dillsburg Yoga for one on one sessions and private classes. I can also be caught occasionally filling in for classes at Dillsburg Yoga and H2L Studio. Keep watch on my events page to see what other things pop up! Join my newsletter to get monthly announcements of ongoing events!

 www.SpiritualHeArtsLLC.com

Jennifer Rabenstein 

Spiritual HeArts LLC

(717)756-7079

"Where the art of spiritual healing occurs in creative and YOU-nique ways!"

Spiritual Healing - Jennifer Rabenstein